CONCERT

(DISCLAIMER: I know some of my church's youths are going for a Hillsongs Concert but what I am going to touch on later is by no means targetted at them but on the general Christians. This is my personal conviction impressed upon by what the Lord is speaking to me and what I have witnessed. If you disagree or have any inputs, pls feel free to leave a comment )

Hillsongs are coming once again to Singapore. If I’m not wrong, one of the mega churches has invited them. And everybody is going around talking about the Hillsongs Concert. Who doesn’t know who Hillsongs is. They are a spiritual band with spiritual leaders and singers, with beautiful and spiritual songs. They are role models to many of the Christians individual and bands. I personally do love Hillsongs, especially Reuben Morgan. I always find his composition very down to earth and yet so meaningful and spiritual. For example, “Who compares to You” and many many more.

For the last 7 years, I had attended countless Christian concerts and I must say I am very blessed by the spiritual elements. My understanding of God has improved, my understanding and application of worship, individually and corporately has been broaden, my passion for music has been widened. I see that there is no reason why I shouldn’t attend more of such concerts. Or am I wrong?

Theoretically, I should and would want to throw myself into any opportunity to witness and encounter any Christian concert that comes along the way. But somehow or rather, the Lord is speaking to me. He is giving me a new perspective of the way I should look at Christian Concert. He is still talking to me and showing me the different angles but as for now, I will just like to share with you what He has spoken to me.

I guess the first thing I will talk about is the word “Concert”. By far, this is the word that has been used by the general to mention about the event. I am not trying to be legalistic here but I feel it is important not to take things or words for granted. I believe in justification. What do I mean by that? If we were to check the dictionary, what does the word Concert mean? Quick definition will be Performance, Show. We as Christians know that worship is never a performance or a show. It is an outward, sincere expression of our love for God. The word itself has undermines the true faith and does not justify our sincere worship unto God. Another point is that, if I were to mention that there is a secular so and so Concert, what does it tell you immediately? The concert belongs to the so and so band. For example, there is an XYZ Concert and we will immediately register it as a concert that focus on XYZ band. Likewise, calling it Hillsongs Concert, or whatever name Concert, it does not emphasize on the focus point. There is a chance that many or rather some will be pulled away from the main focus, which is God, and instead place their focus on the band or the music (disclaimer: I am not blaming the bands. I am just making a point that the word Concert is not a very good word to use). Having critically assessed the word, so is there any solution? I have thought through if there are other better words. Conference. Sounds too secular and management. Symposium. Hmmm, another word for conference. Outreach. Threatening to non-believers. Fellowship. Something that I like but the word sounds too heavy compared to Concert. I don’t have a definite solution. I guess the word Concert in itself denotes a safer and less threatening environment and I believe very much the main attraction is FUN. I personally am fine with the word Concert (no! I am not contradicting myself). I wish that there could be a better word to justify our worship onto God. Even though the word Concert is to be used because of practical reasons, then as a Christian, I must know that my worship is never a concert.

The second point I want to bring up is the purpose of the concert (for practical reason, I will use the word concert when mentioning about the event). I remembered my first concert was when I was 17 or 18 and I attended the Festival of Praise. I was a new Christian then and I was very encouraged, inspired by Hillsongs Australia. My spiritual life has changed after since. And after every subsequent visit to such concerts, my life grew. However, I came to this point of realization. What’s my intention of going for such concert? The music, the big crowds, the occasion, the fellowship? I start to question my intention. As I looked at the concert, I realized that the original intention was always to be an evangelistic outreach. That’s the purpose of the concert. All these while, I have been attending such concert because I found it beneficial to MYSELF only. Never have I once even contemplated to bring or invite any non-believer to the concert. I see no purpose in going to such concert and not bringing or even inviting a non-believer along. Don’t get me wrong. I am not discouraging or judging those who go and not bring a non-believer. If an individual feels that he/she is blessed by God when he/she goes for the concert, by all means go. But personally, I feel that I would have missed out on the best blessing if I do not bring a non-believer. Until I have seen God doing a miraculous work in a non-believing friend, I can firmly say I have not seen the full blessing of God.

The third point is more of a precaution to all Christians. Such concerts are always beneficial and a blessing to our spiritual life. But at the same time, it can swing to the other side. Every time I attend such concerts, I always see the charismatic side. Everybody is pouring forth their voices, hands risen to the max, jumping to the beat (in some cases, catching up with the beat), dancing to the melody, speaking forth in tongues. This is in fact a beautiful sight. Every tongue and tribes will worship the Lord. Yet after witnessing such sight, I couldn’t help wonder if every single one is an authentic worshipper or not. How’s their personal worship like? Is it consistent with the way they worship when worshipping corporately? Back in their own church in the service, are they able to worship with the same attitude together with the more traditional congregation? Some may argue that they feel more comfortable to worship in such occasion than back in church where everything is less ‘charismatic’. True! I agree! Sometimes back in our own church there is certain style or inadequacies that restrict the more ‘charismatic’ worship. But let us remind ourselves, worship is not about convenience. It is about sacrifice. God is like a 7-11, always there but by no means is He a convenience shop. Come to the Lord with awe and reverence. And also, our personal worship dictates our corporate worship and not the other way round. So if even in your own personal worship time, you can’t even raise your hands or sing out to the Lord, I don’t expect to see these when you are worshipping corporately. If one’s personal worship does not reflect one’s corporate worship, then I must say the word Concert fits perfectly into that one’s life.
Another precaution is addiction. Such concert becomes an addiction. It becomes a booster to people spiritual life. After such concert, they feel energized and ready to go out to battle and when they have lost energy, they come back for another booster. These people are no different from a drug abuser. Let me get myself right. Such concert do having refreshing, renewing, healing purpose but then it should not draw our focus away from God because all the refreshing, renewing, healing are from God and not the event. If such events are not held, then will you still be able to be refreshed, renewed, healed?

It is not my intention to discourage people to go for such concerts. If the concert can bless you richly, by all means go. But I just feel that we should go with a purpose. It’s more than just for worship because we all can worship God anywhere, anytime. If it’s an evangelistic outreach, then do make an effort to bring a non-believer. If it’s fellowship, then invite the whole church and not be exclusive. At that same time, I want to end with a note of thanksgiving to God. I thank God for raising so many wholistic Christian band who have committed their life to bring the good news to the world. My prayer is that we as Christians will know and most importantly carry out Your purpose.

Finally, I have decided. It is YOU!

Yes! I have decided. I have been thinking hard, I have been planning, I have been seeking advises, I have been hesitating, I have been searching high and low, I have been sleepless and appetite-less(ok this is exaggerating). I have come to a conclusion. It has to be you. I had make a choice and I will stay with this choice. I have decided what to wear for Charles and Emily's wedding. I will wear YOU on that day! Yeah! Cheers!
Haha! I'm mad! y^v^ Actually wanted to try something else. This is bad but I know most of the rest of the guys will be turning out in white-long-sleeved with a tie and I refused to be in the same dress code as them. Haha! I actually wanted to wear a biege-top with a white vest. So was looking high and low for the WHITE vest. Couldn't find any, so also dun have much time to shop around. So I guess, I just go to my wardrobe and mix and match. And guess wat? I manage to match some tops. Haha! You want to know wat i will be wearing? DUN TELL YOU! ^O* (background: "erh scuse me, like who cares to know what you'll be wearing! once a dumpling, always a dumpling! Doesn't matter wrapped in leaves or plastic!) *o*" Hahahahaha! I'm looking forward to the wedding but yet also not looking forward to the wedding. Why? Becoz firstly it means exams are nearing. Secondly, haiz......... NVM! tsk tsk! Let's rejoice in this ocassion. Hehe! Naughty me! I'm thinking when we will see Charles Junior! Muahahahaha! Den 1 more toddler to play with! Pro-creation is good and it is in line with God's will

Genesis 1

28 God blessed them and said to them, "Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air and over every living creature that moves on the ground."

FUNNEH??? *<>*

Haha! Just wanted to update on some interesting things that happen yesterday. Was suppose to go to school. So was at Dhoby Ghaut MRT. Den suddenly from behind somebody called out "ZHU BA JIE!" And I spontaneously turned around, not to check out the commotion but rather, I turned around becoz I self-conciously thought that somebody had called me. Thankfully, I didn't reply and that person was a distance away. Phew! haha! Has always been like that. Used to people calling me nicknames. I had so many nicknames since primary school and I learned to accept people's humour on my name. In primary school, i remember my bus-kaki all call me Jelly becoz I was ... scuse me! not becoz I'm slimy but rather becoz i was very soft. Haha! And another interesting abt this bus-kaki thingy is we have a hireachy system. We have a Lao Da who usually is one of the oldest kid and he(so far no she) will take care of the rest. In my last year of my primary school, i finaly make it to the top seat. For 1 year, I was the Lao Da where the younger kids will look up to me. Haha! King! Then also on the bus we will play alot of games. We played Chinese Zombie on the bus. Very hard to explain how we play lah but we really enjoyed it. We also play "Ji Go Pak" but slightly different. We played in pairs. 2 vs 2. Shiok! I was one of the top King! Also at certain route, there will be a hump. All of us will be at the last row of seats waiting for Uncle to drive pass the hump and everybody will throw themselves into the sky. Haha! So fun.. until once i kena called by Uncle and got a caning. I was crying so badly until my Lao Da had to console me like a little boy. haha! Shiok siah! Den I also had sweet memory. My first crush. Haha! We were in the same bus for 1 year. Uncle will always pick me up before picking her up. So we usually have a pre-arranged seatings. So my and her seatings were apart. So I purposedly told Uncle i want to change seat and purposedly sit behind her seating. Haha! Shiok! We will like once in a while play "Ji Go Pak" and I will purposedly let her win. Haha! But then she moved house den no longer take the same bus. So sad. But I kept sitting at the same spot, remembering all the sweet memories. Haha! How sweet and innocent can one be when one is young! Anyway back to my nicknames. Secondary also got a lot. Zhu Ba Jie lah, Xiang Jie (Aroma Sister). Den in JC got Xian Ji (Salted Chicken). Den in army got Zhu Zhu(erh.... xox") Den also if you call my name very first it sound like Jie Jie or vice versa. So many times outside and even in church, when people called their Jie Jie, I will spontaneously turned around to check out who is calling me. Pai Seh man! Haha! But i still love my name!

Den another interesting thing was when I was at PS. I was in this video shop and they usually have a few TV on screening different shows. So I happened to look at this TV which was screening a muted WWE. It was showing this female wrestler on the ring yelling away. The funny thing was at the background, another TV was playing this either Korean or Jap movie and was the voice of a female crying and lamenting. It was so funny at that point. Seeing a female wrestler and hearing a different language in a crying tone. I nearly burst out laughing. Haha!

Hmmmm

A lot of things had happened but I am not too keen to update. Always like tat one. Once near exams, xian 1/2. (no wonder my mum gave me my name) Haha! I'm trying to look on the bright side. This will be my last semester.... if i even clear it. Haha! I must and I will with hard work and God's grace and favour. Most prob this will be the last update (cross-fingered) until after exams. Haha!
Maybe just update on one incident. A very cute and funny incident. During our Mission Dinner Nite, while in the midst of William's sharing, litte Daniel needed to go to the bathroom. Since William was busy, I offered myself to help bring Daniel to the toilet. To my 'horror', he wanted to do BIG one. Oh gosh! HOw! I nvr done such 'maintenane' work before. Haha! I tot of getting Lydia to help but then think again, maybe it is a good training ground for me. So little Daniel sat on the bowl happily while I stand at the door still pondering on the question: "What am i doing here?" haha! So as Daniel was doing his biz, he was making the farting sound with his lips. So I decided to show him how to do the pop sound using the lips. And I ask him if he knew how to do it. And to my surprise, he answered cheekily, "This one too simple, I dun want to do" It really caught me off guard and gave a heartily laughter. People outside must be wondering which cranky person is in the toilet. But as I laughed it out, somehow the word really spoke to me. Do we have such mentality as well? Do we find excuses to not to do some things. In our service to our Lord, do we clearly distinguish what we can do or what we shd do or not. This service is too trival and simple for me therefore I won't do. Stacking of chairs are for the LOGISTIC people, I dun want to do. The list can go on. Sometimes, I'm guilty of making excuses. But it really points down to our heart. In our mouth, we profess that our Lord is a servant King but do we follow His servanthood heart or do we just simply want to be served as a king. Society has shaped us to be inwards looking, taking care of ownself first and being oblivious with the needs of the people around us. I really admired many of our church and ministry workers. They get themselves involved in works that are above what is required from them. And I know it's from their heart, their love for God. But yet it is also sad that many who comes to church, comes with a heart of just being a member. They come with the mentality of what can the church offer me and BY THE WAY, here is what I can OFFER to the church. This mentality is seen thruout church from the youths to the adults. I am saying this not to discriminate or judge against such people but it really saddens my heart. How can one behave as if he or she doesn't belongs to the family? This is not a recreational or country club. Being part of the family requires commitment and love as well. It's not just about paying your 'bills' and you are done. I am worried. Becoz if that's how this generation is moving towards, I can only pray for God's grace and mercy be upon them.

Lord! Help us to heart Your heart beat. Help us to see Your vision. Forgive us for our selfishness and our inwardly looking heart. Help us to turn away and instead fix our eyes on You. Let us move towards where You are moving. Let us come together as a family, loving one another, serving each other, just like what Jesus would have done. Lord, have mercy upon us! Amen!

haTe haZe

Haze, Haze... Go away
Come again
Another...... (@$#&*@&#*$&#@($

Dun ever come back. You are disrupting my life. The weather becomes so warm and everywhere seems like it's in a fire aftermath. Smoke everywhere. I dun mind if it's like Genting cool fog but it's totally different. And I also realised something from this haze. My nose not working too well. People tell me they can smell BBQ smell becoz of the haze but I totally couldn't. But funny leh! When 'SOMEBODY' sneaked out some gas, I can smell. Why? MR ONG, care to explain why? haha! opss....! Nvm. I think the worst is the haze is disrupting my keep-fit session. I can't go outdoor at all. I can't go play basketball. ARrrrrrrrrgggghhhhhhhh. And I have been feasting the last few days. That's it! I'm putting it back. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
And the haze also affects the mood. Haizzzzzz! Pls, let the haze go away. I want the sun! I want to be cheerful! Yeah!!!!! q : :P

MEN vs BOYS

Yesterday (Sunday), came to church early to bring granny to church and as well as to prepare for worship. Was playing Bass. Finally, I could hear myself. And no more "ko ro pok" sound. I found that the sound was clearer, cleaner and superb. WOOOO HOOO! If I can hear it, it also means everybody else can hear it. Play wrong = everybody hear it. Hmmmm....... But was shiok lah! (and also a big thanks to those who encourage me with their kind comments on my playing! it's all by God's grace)
Oh! And it happens to be our church 3rd Parish Birthday! Wooo HOOO! God is good and His hands have been always there guiding us. By His grace and love He has brought us this far. And I'm sure the Lord has more exciting plans ahead for us. Let's gear ourselves towards what He has planned for us.
So after the 2nd svc, went with the UNCLEs to celebrate Peter's birthday! Went to Sakura at Eastpoint. I ordered only Thai Iced Coffee (uncle Dino calls it Fried Ice Coffee; always disturbing the waiter or waitress) as I ate alot of Birthday brownies. muahaha! Had alot of fun with the uncles. Talked alot and crack jokes. My my! It's so fun to be with the 'old man' You may think they are just a bunch of outdated oldies, in their own time zone. But if you think this way, I'm really sorry for you. You are missing out the good stuffs. They really know how to enjoy themselves, pamper themselves. After the meal, went with Dino to pick up family then we left for Siglap Secondary for the soccer match - Veteran Match: SACC vs All Saints.
Well to keep the match commentary short, we won with a margin of 4-1. However the match wasn't that pretty. A lot of unfriendly and ugly incidents. The intial plan agreed was the match was to field a bulk of uncles. We fielded all uncles except for me and brian. The other side had abt less than half uncles and main bulk of youths. We started off the game well and I guess some of our uncles played pretty hard cotact which 'provoked' the opponents' youths. So they retaliate with rough and unfair play. Then some of the youths (realised that their feet can't do the move) start to let their mouths do the 'moves'. Sacarcism start flying. I was the culprit as well lah! But they started first. Uncle Phua got tackled in the leg and was limping. So I just commented it's an Old man injury. So some 'gin na' shot back at me saying "I tot they say they fielding kids" So I abit not too happy lah! So I purposely look at Uncle Brian and say," Uncle Brian, you know you are a fat kid." (sorry uncle brian, that was a big sacrifice for you) Then they also not too happy den start whining like babies. Well! I stop at that point alreadi. No point arguing with kids. Anyway, my feet is doing the talking. Theirs are just whining. Haha! I'm 25 and I will not resort to arguing foolishly. FULL STOP.

As I looked back on this match, though of it's ugliness, I learn a lot from it.
Firstly, I must really affirm and praise James. He was intentionally "zham'' in his thigh by the opponent. Instead of immediate retaliation, he stood up and walk off. My goodness! What a proud thing to do! Honestly, James look very cool when he just walked off and make the opponent look like a complete fool! A young boy showing an older boy what is sportmanship and most importantly, what is the right thing to do in God's eyes. If for me, I can't guarantee I can keep my cool. So James, not sure if you reading, but I just want to say, I learn something valuable from you that day. Anyway, shame on our uncles, they were the ones who invaded the field confronting the players. I know you all protecting the boys but very bad thing to do. GO and reflect. (hehe)
Secondly, I feel that our boys have matured alot. In the past, the boys always play to win. During the second half, we substituted the boys in and as they played, they were under immense pressure but not once did any lost their cool. And in a hard contact, nvr did they show their temper. My my! I'm so proud of all of them. It's like seeing your own son maturing. The joy, the pride, the heart-warming feeling. And I believe very much it's not the work of man but the work of God. The fruit of the Holy Spirit. So keep it up!
Thirdly, I think it's prety sad that even when Christians come together, it can turn so ugly. I'm not saying that the fault lies with the opponent. We do play a part in it. Sometimes, man(i'm referring to everybody) tends to let emotion run wild especially when in a tight situation. Usually, when you are losing in a match, they can't manage the emotions and they start either showing their frustrations or blabbering. I personally feel that losing a match at most just loses one's pride. But losing one's cool is as good as losing one's intergrity. Action speaks louder than words. Dun go around professing about your faith when your action is nothing but fallen short of what it is. I'm guilty of being a lousy testimony at many times. I am still learning and I thank God for teaching me this lesson in such a gentle manner. I can only come to the Lord seeking for His forgiveness and that He will continue to fill me with the fruit of the Holy Spirit.

Back to the game. I played the 1st half as a left back. Not very comfortable becoz last time played defender nvr play offside. So wasn't able to adapt to play to the last man. Keep kena Uncle Dino screaming at me. Haha! But I tot I did well. Got twice I push-up the ball to mid field. Then very shiok becoz the feeling of creating threat to the opponent is so great. The opponents just look helplessly at you as you bring the ball up. Then one of the chance, I indirectly created a goal. Muahahaha! Cheers to me! But need to work on stamina. Improved but still running like a buffalo. Muahaha!

Sweet Day

It's a sweet day! (with lots of humour at Tampines McDonald! The bunch of us will be banned from there very soon!) And it's also filled with mixed feelings. Haha!

1 Big Mac Meal.... DOWNSIZE PLEASE!

Well! Today, I will share my 3 cents worth about losing weight. There are many reasons why people want to lose weight. "I want to wear sexier clothes'' "I want to look good" "I want to be as slim as that xxx model" "I want to appeal to the opposite sex" Blah blah! I am sure there's a whole list of reasons. To be frank, I am in the midst of 'trying' to lose weight. Am I motivated by the reasons above? I dun think I dare to deny. I sure do want to have good figure, wear nice fitting clothes, be attractive etc etc etc. But I guess my main motivation is not all these. These to me are just by-product of losing weight. My main reasoning is HEALTH.
Being unnecessary 'overloaded' poses a lot of health issues. Heart problem lah, artilery kena stuck lah, diabetic lah, kidney failure lah, blah blah. I may not have this problem now as I am still young but I can't guarantee in another 10 years time. I dun want to be struck with such diseases becoz of my weight issue. It's going to be financially draining and most importantly, those love ones around me will be burdened too.
Look at this way, when one is struck with illness, he/she will not be able to fully 100% love the people around them and neither can they fully 100% received the love from the people around them. What do I mean by that? Imagine I tell my loved ones that I love them while spilling blood, I can't imagine how sad that situation is. I can't fully express my love to them in my sickness. And likewise, the loved ones will have to share the burden to take care of me. This is definitely still love but love with a heavy burden. I will prefer them to love me with a carefree heart. Having said this, I'm not blaming those who had sickness that they are irresponsible and had caused hardship to the people around them. Sometimes, sickness can still struck when we are healthy. There are situations beyond our control. What I am trying to say is that in my best effort, I should take good care (stewardship) of my body so that it can be used by God in it's best optimise level.
So, this is my motivation! To lose weight for God, not for vainity nor for my own interest. That this body is for the Lord's use and let it be at the best condition. (hehe! secondary interest: wear nice clothes and look good) Another 7kg more to lose till year end. Must peservere on!

I'm In Love..... Once again

haha! Yes, I'm in love. But I won't say what I'm in love. haha!
Today decided to give myself a treat. Movie Buffet. I watched 3 movies. The Lake House, The Brothers Grimm and Take The Lead. Here's my verdict of the show
(DISCLAIMER: THESE ARE JUST PURELY MY PERSONAL COMMENT. IF YOU DON'T AGREE OR LIKE IT, I'M SORRY ABOUT IT! IT IS STILL JUST MY COMMENT)

The Lake House
Rating: 6/10

As I mentioned earlier on, I said I had watched a Korean version much earlier. This english version simply take the concept and the storyline is pretty much the same as the Korean one. It is about how this guy and lady met. But they lived 2 years apart. Their own form of contact was thru this mail box of this same house they are living in but in 2 different time zone. So the whole story develop and blah blah blah and they live happily ever after. However, I enjoyed the Korean one more. The Korean version was done in more arty way. If i didn't remember wrongly, there was less talking. The director was able to create this atmosphere where both parties are expecting for a reply from the other party. As a viewer, I too felt that feeling. It's like I'm part of the movie. However in the english version, that part of the story flow too fast. No chemistry. Haiz! What a pity. One good thing abt this version is the ending ended differently from the Korean version. At least the director didn't take whole-sale from the korean version.

Conclusion: Watch the Korean version.

The Brothers Grimm
Rating: 6/10

Hmmm.. B-Grade Horror-Comical Movie. Interesting story idea but the whole flow was like nothing much. No suspense, no thrill, no horror, no acting-skill, no romance.... Nothing! Honestly, to rate 6/10 is like doing injustice to my taste. As for the story, it's abt this 2 brothers who initially goes around cheating money by faking evil spirit in villages and then getting rid of them. Then the story develop till they really came to this village where the nearby forest is enchanted. Girls were being kidnapped and they were forced to go and save them from the evil witch-queen. Blah blah blah! So they saved them and it is a happy ending after all. Wow! I am lost for words.

Conclusion: Pay me the money! I will give you real horror and thrill.

Take The Lead
Rating: 8.5/10

This is such a great movie. Why did I totally miss it in the movie? I guess it didn't appeal to the mass. It is about this ball-room dance teacher who decided to go to this school and help this 'school-rejects' to turn over a new leaf thru dancing. Initially, it was hard becoz firstly the teenagers are hip-hop dancer and secondly, becoz they are seen as 'rejects', they do not have high self-esteem. So the teacher had a tough time but slowly he showed them the coolness of ballroom dancing and yet at the same time accepting their own culture and dance. Slowly they build this trust and friendship. They worked hard and picked up different types of ballroom dancing - Waltz, Tango, Salsa... Fantastic! Then the teacher sign them up for this ballroom dance competition. They did brilliantly at the competition - especially at one of the segment (can't remember if it's Salsa or Tango). Suppose to be a couple dance, they had a 2men-1lady dance. Very good idea though they didn't win but it was still very good. I guess it is more than just dancing. There was a moral to it. The teacher, who was under negative reaction from the parents, explained that his method of teaching is about teaching trust and respect. The guy leads the dance and the lady follows. The lady follow becoz she trust the guy and the guy also need to respect the lady. This is one cool and good movie not to miss especially those who love dance (for those pro, pls do not be too critical abt the dance movement and tactics and blah blah! it's just a movie! Enjoy it)

Conclusion: I am dancing all my way!

Well! As I have said earlier on, I am in love with....... dancing. Yeah! As I watch the movie, it really struck upon me. Life is just like a dance. God is the 'guy' who leads in the dance. And I am the 'lady' who simply just trust in Him and follow Him. Imagine if He leads and I simply just dance to my own rhythm and my moves. It's going to be a messy and ugly dance. But if I flow with Him, it's going to be my best dance(life). Something to think about. Personally, I love dance. I dun dare to say I'm a good dancer (especially i'm one who can't keep in beat) but I would love to dance. It's like freedom. Free to express yourself. Don't know how to explain lah but it's really real joy to dance. Maybe I shall go pick up ballroom dancing. Maybe continue with Salsa! Haha! YES! I AM IN LOVE WITH DANCING. But first need to lose more flabs. Kinda uncomfortable to dance with spare tyres. Haha! Talking about losing weight, I feel like bringing up my 3 cents worth of 'theory' on losing weight. Maybe not this entry. Another time. I LOVE DANCING! DANCING LOVE ME!

Craze over.....

Dun know why but suddenly in this mood. This mood to watch movies. But then not at the movies becoz nobody is as free as me to watch at the cinema and neither do I want to watch alone. So end up going to VCD shop to buy VCD and DVD. Haha! Last month I bought 4 VCDs. The Myth, Hoodwinked, Wallace and Gromit and Pirates of the Caribbean.
The Myth isn't that fantastic. The whole plot nothing fantastic and the Korean lady like a vase. Not much acting time for her. Honestly very disappointing.
Hoodwinked is pretty interesting. A bit of suspense but half way thru the movie I know the 'culprit'. However, it is interesting on how the story is being developed. Recommended.
Wallace and Gromit is highly recommended. Simple storyline but yet the whole plot is interesting and exciting.
Pirates of the caribbean (first episode) is superb. I regretted not watching it in the movies. I suppose everybody has watched it and need none of my recommendation. If you haven't watch, pls for your own sake go get the VCD or DVD for clearer picture.
Then today just bought another 4 DVDs. 16 Blocks, The Grim Brother, Take the lead and The Lake House. Haven't watch any of it yet. But i believe all are good movies. Muahahahahaha! Maybe i will watch The Lake House first becoz I actually know the story of this movie. Actually this is an re-enactment of a Korean movie which I had watch b4. I love the Korean version alot. So hopefully this english version is able to live up to that standard.

Why is it YOU?

Why is the wedding ring worn on the fourth finger? Any ideas! I also dun know why but here's an explanation which I came across. Very interesting! You can try it out for yourself. Here's what you need to do:

1) Firstly, (hmmm. dun know how to explain. just make your hand become the picture below)



2)Now try to open up the thumbs. The thumbs represents your parents. Human goes thru sick and death. The thumbs can be opened means that our parents will have to leave us one day

3)Now close up the thumbs and try to open up the little fingers. The pinky represents our children. One day they will grow up and have their own family.

4) Now close up the pinky and try opening your index fingers. These fingers represents your siblings. They too will have their own family and will part with us.

5) Now close up the index and try opening the fourth fingers. YOu can't right! This reprsents the husband and wife becoming as one. They can't be separated. Cool rite!

4, 7, 9?

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Courage!

What is courage? Is it the absence of cowardness? Or is it doing or saying something that you would never dare to? Or is it a reflection of who is our strength? As a child of God, my courage is not in what I can do or who I am but it's becoz I know God is omnipotent. He is almighty. As long as I'm doing things in His will, I am confident and I have the courage to do it. Well! You may think it's easy said then done. I totally agreed. It's nvr easy. I wish I have the courage to do or say certain things but den I will ask myself if i'm doing it just becoz I want to do it or becoz it is right (in God's eyes) to do it. So den it pours down to not abt being courageous but rather am I in tune with God. If it's His will, den His strength will give me the courage to do it. I dun know if it makes any sense to any of you but even as I write this, I initially am writing with a question in mind. As I write, the answer is revealing. Hmmmm....

God is my strength!

I'm in LOVE......

Yes! I cannot deny anymore. Yes! I'm in LOVE! I have found my true love. In fact, my true love has always been there. I LOVE............... Cooking! Yes! I always enjoy cooking. Dun ask me why! It's just like that. Since young, I will always like to stay beside my mum when she's cooking in the kitchen. I will observe her every actions and will ask her questions. And this is how i picked up my basics. Den later on, it's thru watching cooking shows and observing how other pple cook. I dun dare to say I know how to cook alot of things. I can cook basic chinese dishes. To be frank, frying an egg is the hardest. There's so many ways of cooking an egg. And it really requires skills to cook the egg correctly. I love to bake but I dun know how to bake. Ironica? Yes! I would love to try baking but it's too expenisve. The ingredients are like way too expensive. And imagine I'm trying it for the first time. Imagine the whole things goes wrong and the money is down the drain. Woaahhh! Maybe when i started working den i pick up baking. I think so far I am better with western cuisine. I love my potato salad and pasta. I can say these are the 2 things that I am most comfortable with. Still experimenting on how to improve the dishes. Muahaahahahaha! Maybe they should start to have this title "House-husbands". Isn't this what the ladies want? Equality. YOu go out and bring back the bread and I will make dishes out of the bread. Muahahaaha! Chinese saying "Chi Ruan Fan" (eat soft rice). Too bad last time secondary school nvr offer guys to take Home Econs. I would have enjoyed it alot. Most prob can top the class. hahaha! Well! At least one thing I know is that I will never starve. I know alot of girls will be protesting and even cursing me, but i will still say this, "To depend on (nowadays) girls to dish out a meal for you, I rather do it myself" (Flying frying pan) (!%&#$&#%&#%&) Haha! Dun bother to throw anything at me. Prove me wrong. Bring me food! Edible one! Delicious one! Muaahahahhaha!

WHY? Life is so unfair

Yes! I'm protesting. Life is so unfair. Life being a girl is so much better. They get a wider (sorry! understatement) an unlimited range of closet. It's like what can a guy choose to wear. Either a shirt, T-shirt, polo or pants, shorts, jeans. That's about it. But for a girl, the list goes on. Not fair. haha! I came across this local blog that is selling Korean/Jap clothes. Very nice and also very reasonable price. My! my! How i wish i can wear..... erh.... nvm! muahaha!


Some sample of the dress. The above only S$29. I think it's worth buying sia. Anyway here's the link if anyone of you are interested. http://niuuniu.blogspot.com/

Hua! Hu Ji Hua!

On Tuesday, my noon lecture was cancelled becoz lecturer was sick. Hurray! Ok dun get me wrong. I'm not rejoicing becoz my lecturer is sick but becoz I was able to join the church staff for their staff outing. Ok! I'm not a church staff! But I'm 'close' enough! haha! They were goin to have a picnic at Botanic Garden. WOo Hoo! I think the last time i went was Kindergarden. I vaguely still remember we were all walking around (aimlessly). No idea why I'm looking at trees. Den saw batman hanging on a tree. Guess it didn't manage to get a bath. It was smelling. Den we had lunch which I tot I had a hard time eating. It was packet rice with 1 meat and 1 vege. At that time, I dun eat vege. So was trying to 'pretend' to eat the vege den while nobody is watching, quickly cover the packet and throw away. haha! Well! Coming back to the outing, so went to church to meet the staff. Den Karen was not too keen to drive as she wasn't too sure of the way. So I got the privilege to drive. Haha! Yeah! So drove to Botanic den found a hut where everybody gathered and had our picnic. Everybody was starving. Haha! After lunch was worship and games. And after that we went to S'pore Orchid Garden. Quite impressive. Walk around and I'm amazed at the varieties and names of Orchids. After the walk, we went to a "high-classed'' food court where we had our teabreak. Roti John, Prata, Indian Rojak, Murtabak, drinks. Oh shucks! I think i had put on weight siah! Though i perspire alot from the walk, i think i gain more weight than I have lost. Haha! After the makan, we all left for home.
I really thank God for this church and the staff. Though I had only managed to work with most of them for a year, they had always treated me like one of them. Church is as good as my home. The staff are as good as my own immediate family. Even as i enjoy such priviledges, I learn that I can't take things for granted. I have to make an effort to help them. Whenever I go church, I will always go to church office first to offer my help. This is also my way of thanking them for 'looking' after me. haha! I really can't imagine when i start to work. I will have less time during weekday to pay a visit to the church. I'm goin to miss all these good times. (hmmm. unless i work in church) haha! hmmmm......! haha!

In Memory of VINCE

I received a bad news on Tuesday afternoon. A student in Changkat Changi Secondary Sch had send me a SMS saying that Vince, a student whom I had kept in touched with, had passed away. I thought it could be a mistake. I called up the school and checked with one of the teachers. It was confirmed. I was shocked. He was so young. I was still talking to him face to face a few months ago. I knew him for nearly 3 years. And I never get to know him better. As a friend, I'm not too sure if I had done enough. And I never get to share the good news to him. It's too sudden. And I am so busy this semester that I couldn't go to the school and I never got to speak to him. The last thing that I talked to him was about him having to go to work to get money to support himself. He also briefly mentioned abt his family problems. I simply gave him some advise and told him to call me if he needed any help. I wish I had done more. More than just opening that gap. I thank Vince that during the period when we regularly met, his joy and humour would never fail to brighten up others life.
Vince, you will always be remembered.

Throw or not to throw

ARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! I wish I can throw tantrum. I wish I can just behave like a small kid and simply ignore everything and just play with my tantrum. Or maybe I just want to be 5. No need to think too much. Just be happy everyday. Innocent and ignorance. ARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!

I think i will just closed myself up for a while. Leave me alone. Dun bother me.

Ding Dong! Anybody home?

Is it worth knocking on a closed door? If by knocking, is it considered disobedience, taking things into my own hand? Even if I do knock, how will i react when the door open or when the door remain shut? There's so much things to consider. It's just a door. Can't it be just simplier? And to make things worse, there's fencing, there's guard dog, there's all sort of barriers to the door. What is the intention of all these? Do I take it as an answer as "No, dun bother to go to the door. It's not meant to be. Move on" or do I see it as "It's not going to be easy. Dun give up. Must persevere on" Can't it be simplier? Just a simple Yes or No. I can take the answer. If it's a straight No, den i will just simply move on! But it's neither here nor there.

9"So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 10For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.

Luke 11:9-10

This is Your word. I want to be bold and ask. But yet Lord, not my will but Yours! Help me to discern, help me to know Your will, help me not to look left nor right but fix my eyes on You!

Tuning In

Dun know why but recently tunes are ringing in my mind. It gets stronger everytime when I think of a theme. At present, I have 2 tunes in my mind. 1 is related to Cambodia. Even as I am in the midst of preparing for my 3rd trip up, the Lord is speaking alot to me. From a member to a team leader and now a team advisor. It's quite a big jump and to be frank, I'm feeling abit inadequate. And also with new dynamics of the team and the mission itself, it seems that there are so much things to deal with. I am also making an effort to read up more. Even as I am preparing myself, the Lord impressed upon me abt the people in Cambodia. He reminded me of what the people had gone thru, the sufferings of war, and now poverty and spirtual emptiness. They really need the love of God. They really need to hear about Jesus' good news. And as I ponder upon all these, the tune started to pour in. The words have not been formed but I have a rough idea how the lyrics will flow. The sufferings they had gone thru before and now, and that God is there to heal and build them up once again.
Then the second tune is in relation to my state of life. Lyrics not out but one thing I will say is that it points to His love, His providence, His faithfulness, His timing.
I'm really excited. I never thought I will be able to compose. I dare not say all these songs are fantastic and 'audible' but to me, it is significant becoz these are songs between me and God. Let these be a worship unto You, the Almighty.

For YOU

A few posting ago, I mentioned about God inspiring me with a tune. I must say it's amazing. I dun dare to say this piece of work is perfect but I must say it is something very dear to me becoz it's my own experience and most importantly, God's hands at work. I was going thru an issue with some frens and that's when God came in to reconcile the situation. I guess there's pain and regrets but after this, I believe God has built and reconciled the relationship to the next level. The 'scar' though healed will serve as a reminder of God's grace and love for us. Coming back to the song, during the initial period of the issue, I was pretty sad and disappointed. I tried to talk to someone abt the issue but there wasn't anyone nor was there any clear direction. I knew I had to come to God. As I poured out to Him, He placed this tune into my heart. I was very assured by the tune becoz I knew He heard me and He wanted to speak to me thru this tune. I tried putting words into it but nothing came out. But the tune was good enough. Then the following day, one of the fren came up and apologised for his mistake. I know that he was remorse and was sincere in his apology. Then was followed by an sms from the rest to apologise. At that point, i wasn't angry anymore. I was still disappointed but I'm glad they realised their foolish acts. After this incident, amazingly as i was playing the tune on my guitar, the words start pouring in.
Basically, the whole song is abt the incident. In a body of Christ, there may be times we have hurt each other in our word and actions. There's is the 'victim' and the 'culprit'. But if we bring our conflicts to God, we will see that God is a gracious and loving God. So as for the 'culprit', he/she must humble him/herself and apologise to the 'victim' and also most importantly with God. And as for the 'victim', learn to be forgiving just like what Jesus has taught us "Forgive our sins as we forgive those who sin against us" As we reconciled our differences, let us move on together, encouraging each other, building up each other for all of us are walking the same path that reaches the same goal. Let's do all these for our Lord. Let's ask our Lord to anoint us with His oil and that our heart will burn for Him. Everything that we do, we do it for His sake. I humbly present to you this song inspired by my Majesty - "For You"

We may have hurt each other with our words and what we've done
We may have carried with us pain and shame
Life is all about moving on in God's grace and love
So let us look to Him,
The God of love
Who forgive and heal our pain

Jesus Christ, pour oil on our fire
Let the flame burn for You
Just for You
Standing hand in hand
We run the race
As we reach the line for You
Jesus Christ, pour oil on our fire
Fan the flame in us
Just for You
Our love for You is revealed in the love for one another
I live for You

27He answered: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'[c]; and, 'Love your neighbor as yourself.

Matthew 10:27

A... is for Apple B is for Banana.....

A lthough things are not perfect;
B ecause of trials or pain;
C ontinue in thanksgiving;
D o not begin to blame;
E ven when the times are hard;
F ierce winds are bound to blow;
G od is forever able;
H old on to what you know;
I magine life without His love;
J oy would cease to be;
K eep thanking Him for all the things;
L ove imparts to thee;
M ove out of "Camp Complaining";
N o weapon that is known;
O n earth can yield the power;
P raise can do alone;
Q uit looking at the future;
R edeem the time at hand;
S tart every day with worship;
T o "thank" is a command;
U ntil we see Him coming;
V ictorious in the sky;
W e'll run the race with gratitude;
(e)X alting God most high;
Y es, there'll be good times & yes some will be bad, but...
Z ion waits in glory...where no one is ever sad!

Quality Time....

Today went to visit granny with my mum. So both of us were alone together and while on the MRT, we were chit-chatting. Very rare occasion, i must say. While most of the time, it was her talking but I enjoyed every minute of it. She will be talking abt things in the past, when she was young till her adulthood and etc. Haha! Really interesting. Today, after 25 year existence on earth, I finally heard the story about how she met my dad. She was saying that after graduation, she had been working for a few years. Then she decided to quit and go to Hawaii for holidays. At that time, she was staying at her parents shop houses. So got this neighbour shophouse uncle whom the family know wanted to recommend to my mum this guy who is a Hainanese and single. Hehe. So my granny was asking my mum to try to go and know him as a fren first lorh. But my mum decline becoz she said she not interested and that she is going for 3 months overseas holiday. So she nvr got to know him and she left for Hawaii. Den after 3 months, when my mum came back, she found out that the guy was staying in one of the romm of the neighbour's shophouse. But den nvr got to see him. So the 'kay poh' neighbour once again went to 'ka jiao' my mum. So finally after much persuasion, she finally agreed to try to meet him. Den got once, he was sitting outside the shophouse while my mum came out of the shophouse. As my mum needed to run an errand, she was in a rush and he nvr got to see her. Den finally when they met, he said to my mum, "wow, you walked so fast, until i can't see you" haha! Den my mum was saying her first impression of him wasn't too good. Dun know how to dress. 'Orh biang' Haha! Well! After that, all is history. haha! I dun know. You may think it's a fairy tales ending after all these. I won't dare to say so. I know my mum had suffered and sacrificed so much for the family. And she will always advised me to marry a Christian girl. I know where she is coming from. She is not against non-Christians girls but she knows that if I want to serve God fully, I will need the support and help of one who knows God's heart. And I truly agree with her, having her as life-experience example. She never had the spiritual support from her husband, she has to deal with his irresponsibilities but yet not neglecting her responsibilities. And I must say all these are not becoz she is a mentally strong person but becoz she simply trust in God. She may have regretted getting married to a non-Christian man but her faith grew stronger everyday. But yet i must say, it's not an easy life. Marrying to a Christian partner doesn't mean that there are no problems or issues. All these still exists but we know that God is in control and when it comes to differences, we bring it to God to settle it. But if one partner isn't a Christian, he/she will not be able to understand this, and a lot of times friction turns into bush fires.

From my own family, these are the things that will happen if one of the partner is not a Christian:

1) No spiritual authority or support

For ladies whose husband is not a Christians, there is no spiritual authority in the sense, that God has placed the authority in the hands of the man of the household. If the man is not a believer, then how can he exercise God-given authority. And like-wise, as a man, and if your partner is not a Christian, she will not be able to understand your involvement in church. Initially, she may be fine with your involvement but after a while she may resent tat you are spending too much time in church. There's no spiritual support from her side. After a while, you may be battling to a sad ending. Well! All these can be resolved if the partner is converted. True! i agreed that there are such real-life cases but den firstly it's by God's grace and secondly, let's not forget there are also many cases that didn't succeed.

2) Different belief may result in unnecessary friction

Maybe when both parties are studying or just got to know each other, there is more room for freedom and also grace. But as time goes by, the non-believing party may be wondering why the other party is spending so much time in church. Look at it this way. When you start working, every weekday, you work from 8-6pm. (not including OT and blah blah blah) So it leaves you with weekend as your free time. For me, weekend is nearly all spent in church. (I'm not a fanatic, it's just that my main social circle revolves mainly in church) So how am i able to spend time with my non-believing partner. (well! yes again! the prob will be solved if she is converted! But let's put it this way, I dun wan to take unnecessary risk!) And after a while, the other party will feel that you are placing church over them.

3) Compromising

This usually happen when Christians try to resolve the above problems. "I will simply manage my time spent in church" First will be "I will go for only Sunday service and Friday Cell" Den next will be "I will only go for Sunday service" and next will be "I will attend Easter and X'mas svc" and next will be........... Cutting down the time commitment in church so as to be with their partners. Hmmmm......

4) Unable to fully worship God

I guess this is the main reason why I would not want to have a non-Christian partner. If she never get to convert, I will never be able to fully worship God. Why? Becoz a part of me is not able to worship God. If you understand, when two comes together, they become one. And if you do realise, when 2 come together, it is more than just the lovey dovey part but most importantly, the 2 shd help each other to better worship God! I can't imagine myself trying to worship God and yet in my mind having the burden that she is not saved. I need one who not only love God but also one who can assist me in walking the path the Lord has set for us.

I'm not saying that having a non-believing partner is wrong or a sin. I just feel that there are alot of things to look into before you want to make this choice. And all i can say is there's consequences for every action. If it's a good move, you shd praise God for His grace and love. If it's a bad move, den all i can say is people make mistakes and you shd simply just move on in God's grace and love.

I make this prayer to God. I told Him that I will only wait for a Christian lady who fear and love Him and that she likewise will only wait for a Christian guy who fear and love Him. Sometimes when I think about, I thought that I was plain foolish. Haha! What am I asking for? I must be out of my mind. Maybe? Maybe not! Let this be a test of my faith! Let this be a chance for me to witness the faithfulness of God!

Think before you speak!

I'm sure every era, every century, every generation, pple will have their own form of lingos. This is how they identify with one another. I enjoy every part of the lingo we have becoz many have been formed out of pure creativity. There are also those that were formed becoz of certain incident and it helps us to identify with one another. To outsiders, it may mean nothing and maybe hilarious but it makes a lot of sense to us. But yet, every time I have to be careful with my usage of lingos. Many a times there are a lot of dangers and traps which we do not see. Certain lingos we do not see the significance or we do not know the origin of it. It may have negative influence to ourself without knowing it.

I see that in this generation, pple have been liberalising certain words that are debatable in nature. Like the word gay and lesbian and all the root words. (Hear me clearly, I dun hate gays or lesbians but I dun condone their behaviours.) I see that there are people using the word freely in the sense that these words can becomes adjectives for things. Like some people dun like some things or feel awkward abt something, they will say "this thing is so gay" I have someone telling me this "this color is so gay" just simply becoz he doesn't like it. I was shocked. So mean a colour can be gay? What's next? The colour is HIV contagious huh? Or people seeing guys or girls behaving very intimidating with their good, same gender frens, they will jokingly comment that that is so gay or les. My goodness! Pple do not know what they are saying. As Christians, we believe that God has made Man to be Man and Woman to be Woman. Gayism or lesbianism are a distortation from the evil one. If you understand this, we will be extremely careful not to use these words freely becoz everytime we say or use such words, we are basically saying to the evil one, "Well done! I accept what you are doing in all these people's life!" You may argue that all these are said out of fun with no malicious intention but I tell you, would you go around saying the F word to everyone and say that it's out of fun and no malicious intention. That's something we do want to think abt!

There are also certain words that we commonly used in our daily lives. It seems harmless. We nvr knew its origin but since everyone is using it and no one complains abt it, it shd be alright. Are you sure? I dun think i want to be too comfortable following the majority. Words like "damn" and "bloody". It is commonly used to replace the word 'very' or 'to a great extent'. For example, "You are very pretty" which translates to "You are damn or bloody pretty." Maybe it could be out of exaggeration or sarcasim. The word 'damn' comes from the word "condemn" and if you understand, blood to us Christians reminds us of Jesus' blood. The earlier examples are used in a positive context so it's still not too bad. But many a times, such words are used in bad comments. For example, "You are damn or bloody stupid". The word condemn is a very harsh word and it means you are hopeless, good for nothing. The word damn in itself is such a lousy and negative word. Whether using it for a good or bad comment, it 'corrupts' the message. Let your Very be Very. Also the word bloody which reminds us of Christ and how precious His blood shed for us, we better think twice or even a few more times before we want to use the word to spice up our converstation.

Also there are certain rude words which have been commonlised by the society. So it doesn't sound too 'bad' when said as it is commonly used. For example, "shit lah", "kick your asshole", "WTH", etc...... These are not so nice things to say. It hurts others and it just simply reflect your own nature.

"But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and these make a man 'unclean"

Matthew 15:18

There's this sister of mine and have a habit of saying the word "shit''. So was having a chat with her on this issue and reminded her of the verse and that it requires a conscious effort to remind herself not to say the word. So after a few days, there was this moment that she wanted to spurt out that word but immediately, she withhold her tongues. Though we could tell that she was on the verge of saying that word, I must say I'm impressed with her effort. That's how we need to do to change our bad habits. It's not overnight but it's not impossible. We need to feed ourselves with God's word and understand His word and den we will be convicted by the Spirit that we need to change and that with the guidance and strength from God, we make an effort to change. Let's us continue to encourage one another in doing what is right for God!

I Need............ YOU!

Today was the big day. Most of the things were done. Just left a few more things to tie up and all will be settled. Well! Before this, the day before, I was actually panicking alreadi. As I go thru the items that I need to do, it seemed like there were so many things undone. I told myself that I need to wake up at 7am the next morning to 'piah' and finish up as much things as possible. And another problem with me is that I am quite a 'solo kia'. I do everything myself and I prefer not to delegate to other pple. Despite my worries, I told God to take care of all the matters that were still not done up. So the next morning, I woke up only at 9am. Surprisngly, I wasn't too caught up with the things. So I left for church and reached abt 1o.30am. By around 11am, the rest of the team members were in church. They too had came down to help with the decoration of the event. At that point, I wasn't too sure if I shd trouble them and ask them to help with the remaining task. I just tot of doing it all myself. Den I was just prompted to just ask them. And I just ask them to help me with these and that. And amazingly, things start to finish up faster than i would have if i have done it myself. By 1.15pm, we have cleared all the things we need to do. I was so relieved. In past attempts to lead in events, I was always very pressured and panicky even on the day of event. Becoz firstly, I always fail to delegate work and do everything myself and secondly, I simply just trusted in my own strength. This time round, I'm learning to be more team-minded, getting the team to make decisons and be in charge of certain areas which free me up. (Though i feel i still can delegate more work). Thank you so much for the team, namely, Darren, Wen Yuan, Yvonne, Xin Ling whom have helped so much in the preparation. Also I will like to thank those others who though not in the committee, have been helping us in a way or another. And also those who had kept the team in prayer. And most importantly God for His guidance. I won't dare to say that this year's For Men For Women Celebration Night is a success, but I know God takes delight in it. Everything move so smoothly and this is my 1st time as an emcee, and i simply just told God to take control and He lead. Haha! Pretty fun! Maybe next time will get a partner to co-emcee. : ) hehe.......
My throat now a bit sore from the constant explanation of how to play the games and from the constant raising of my voice to 'try' to bring out the excitement. I realised I can't scream like before. My voice box must have been damaged. I raised my voice a bit higher for a few times and it starts to hurt. Haha! But dun know why. Hitting into mood swing again. Feeling happy but yet moody. I dun know how such two extreme can exist together. It's like I'm walking and running at the same time. Haha! 'sob sob" Hmmmm.......

Dear Father, thank You so much for Your love and Your faithfulness. Thank You for Your hands that carry us up when we are in difficulties. Sometimes we think too much with our own limited wisdom and knowledge and we conclude that we have an answer. But Lord, how foolish can we be at times. We fail to see Your plan which is far better than what we can comprehend. Den Lord, I ask that You give me the patience to wait upon You, knowing and trusting that You have the best for me. And most importantly is that I need You more than any other things. So Lord have Your way in me! Amen.

Life... is all about moving on in God's grace and love

What do people do when they are hurt or depressed? It always seem like these people will never come out from this situation. Even if they get over it, it leaves a deep scar that never heals properly. For me, I always find enough grace to move on from the situation and though there's a scar, it just serve as a reminder that God is faithful. I'm not sure if it applies for everybody. For me, I must give thanks to God. I am very privileged to have a God who is forgiving and loving and faithful. Because of what He had done in my life and how He had treated me, I know He is in control of everything. Emotions are something I believe that the Lord has blessed us with. We are beings with freedom to exercise our feelings. We can be happy, we can be sad, we can be angry, we can be quiet..... There's nothing wrong even if our feelings are negative. It's only wrong if we bring it to the extreme. It is wrong if our sadness becomes bitterness, if our anger becomes hatred.... These are not from God. Basically, where is God when we are expressing our emotions? In our happiness, is God our source of happiness. In our sadness, do we turn to God for comfort and help. In our anger, do we turn to God to look upon His grace and love? In my best conscious effort, when i'm in any emotions, I try to bring God in. One thing I feel the Lord has blessed me with is the ability to move on from set-backs or hurts. This is not becoz I'm a gracious or forgiving person but becoz I know God is gracious and loving. Recently, certain thing had happened and it really brought me closer to God. As we read Psalm, you will find that there are many songs written by David when he is in situations of difficulties. His songs are cry out to God and also there are songs that glorified God for his deliverance. And somehow like David, I had this experience. A tune started to form in my head as I look to Him for counsel. And I really feel so much for this song not becoz I compose it but God has given this song not just to me but us. I hope I can share this song soon, after the whole situation has been closed. To God be the glory, for the things He has done! Amen!

Worship.... Drama..... Abstract Mime.....Dance

Really such an enjoyable day. Though very tired and most of the time couldn't really concentrate. After church 2nd svc, went for a Worship Symposium at erh Church of the Accesion. Is it? Can't remember. So it was worship first led by Clement Chow. (he was the composer for Count on me Singapore) He was on accoustic guitar with a saxaphonist player. Led in 2 songs. Majesty and Here I am to worship. The chords he played is quite interesting, different from the usual chords. Pretty creative but there were certain points the unusual chords didnt' fit in. So was like one moment feeling very refreshed by the new style den the other moment feeling distracted becoz it just didn't fit. haha. Afterwhich was a devotion by Rev Canon James Wong. Wow! His sharing really meaty. So much things and so much reference. I was having a hard time finding my way thru the 'fatty meats'. After the devotion, we broke into our clinics. I had signed up for Performing Acts. hehe! I would have loved to sign up for Guitar or Bass but I tot I wanted something different from the usual. I like performing arts though I have not done any. So why not? Something new for a change. Only 4 guys and about 10-12 ladies. Haha! Today's clinic was on Mime. The teacher is Dawn. She graduated from some Art Sch. So for the first half, she was giving a whole load of introduction. Really interesting but catch no ball. haha! But one thing I found out was tat Mime is not always a silent play. A silent play is a form of Mime. haha! I nvr knew that. After introduction, she got us to do some warmup which was near to distorting our body. Thankfully i'm still pretty sporty and flexible. There was this move where you lie on your back and with both leg straighten, move it towards your head and touch the ground with your toes. Haha! I was able to do it last time when I was still learning TaeKwanDo. And guess what? i still can do. Did it for 4 times and den kena leg cramp. haha! So after the warm up, she demonstrated some footwork. Very interesting. We all get to try out and to be frank it wasn't easy and require a lot of focus and effort. So after a while everybody start to feel the strain. Den the last 1o minute, she did a Mime for us. (she is into abstract Mime) So was very good. I was so engrossed into her passion and acting. That's the kind of art of looking for. Abstract art. It's all about feeling and being part of the play. I really enjoy it. As I ponder, how i wish I could go and explore this area of art? It is so fun, it's so satisfying, it's so aspiring, it's so enjoyable, it's so exciting, it's so full of surprises. I dun know how to express my feelings. It's something i tot i can use for the works of God, to spread His message, His love. Haha! Well! maybe if i was much younger, much thinner and have the support, I would have moved into this area. Well! I guess not. But I dun think I will end my dream here. I can't be a dancer, an actor, a mimer, but I can be one who inspire others to achieve such goals and even be involved in realising such arts and bring it into the world. Yes! Yes! That will be so beautiful. Performing for the Lord!

If.... Love just passes you by.......

Something that I came across. Typical drama serial storyline. But guess what? It may just happen in real life..........

Life...

I stared at the girl next to me. She was my so
called "best friend". I stared at her long, silky
hair, and wished she was mine.
But she didnt notice me like that, I knew it.
After class she walked up to me and asked me for
the notes she had missed the day before and
handed them to her. She said "thanks" and gave me a
kiss on the cheek. I wanna tell her, I want her to
know that I don`t wanna Be just friends, I love her
but I`m just too shy, and I don`t know why...

11th Grade
The phone rang. on the other end it was her.
Shewas in tears, mumbling on and on about how
her love had broke her heart.
She asked me to come over because she
didn't want to be alone, so I did. As I sat next to her
on the sofa, I stared at her soft eyes, wishing she
was mine.
After 2 hours, a drew barrymore movie, & 3 bags of
chips, she decided to go to sleep. She looked
at me, said "thanks" and gave me a kiss on the
cheek. I wanna tell her, I want her to knowthat I
don`t wanna be just friends, I love her but I'm
just too shy, and i don't knoiw wHy
Senior Year. The day before prom she walked to my
locker. "My date is Sick" she said; he`s not qonna go. well
I didnt have a date and in 7th qrade we made a
promise that if neither of us had dates we
would go together just as "best friends". So we did.

Prom niqht
After everything was over I was standing at
her front door step. I stared at her, She smiled at
me I want her to be mine, but she doesn`t think of
me like that and I know it. Then she said "I Had the
best time, thanks!" and gave me a kiss on the
cheek. I wanna tell her, I want her to kno that I
don`t want to be just friends, I love her but Im
just too shy, and I dont kNow why

Graduation Day
A day passed, then a week, then a month.
before I could blink, it was graduation day. I watched
as her perfect body loated like an anqel up on
staqe to qet her diploma. I wanted her to be mine,
but she didnt notice me like that, and I knew it.
Before everyone went home, she came to me in her
smock and hat, and cried as I hugged her.
then she lifted her head from my shoulder and
said, you`re my best friend, thanks!" and gave me a
kiss on the Cheek. I wanna tell her, I want her to
know that don`t wanna be just friends, I love her
but I`m just too shy, and I don`t know why

A Few Years Later now I sit in the pews of the
church. that girl is gettinq married now. I
watched her say "i do" and drive off to her new I wanted
her to be mine, but she didn`t see me like that
and I knew it. But before she Drove away, she came
to me n said you came!" She said. "thanks!" and
kissed me on the cheek. I wanna tell her, I want
her to know that i dont wanna be just friends, I
love her but I`m just too shy, and i don`t know
why.

Years passed, I looked down at the coffin of a
qirl who used to be my "best friend". at the service
they read a diary entry she had wrote in her
hiqh school years.
This is what it read: I stare at him wishing he
was mine, but he doesn`t notice me like that, and I
know it. i wanna tell him, i want him to know
that I don`t wanna be just friends, I love him but I'm
just
too shy, and I don`t know why. I wish he
would tell
me he loved me...I wish I did too. I thought to
myself, and I cried...

Dun miss a chance. But remember God never miss you. You are not forsaken nor forgotten. He has a great plan for every one of us. Those who hears and obeys His voice, will be blessed greatly by His plan.

YOU Give and Take Away!

Guess what? It's no mistake that I have entered a same Title from a previous post. On my earlier post, I was talking abt the song Blessed be Your name and the bridge, You give and take away, impressed upon me the most. And less than a few days, the meaning was even clearer to me. I think on Sunday, I had joined the morning pre-service prayer and Robert was there. He was praying and he kept saying Blessed be Your name. Well! Maybe it's coincidence. But yet the words sunk deep in my heart. And today, as I surfed the Blogs, I came across someone's blog mentioning abt the song and also the bridge, You give and take away. Coincidence again? Maybe! But it speaks alot to me. And I believe that's what the Lord has for me. He bless and He also takes away things in my life. So when He takes away, what will my heart choose to say? Curses? I hope not! I do hope my heart will not turn cold and instead choose to say Blessed be Your name, my Lord, who is above all and who is Almighty. Let me wait on You! Even when that time comes and Your will is to close that door, then let my heart choose to say Blessed be Your name, for I know You have something better for me. Amen!

Mission Trip

3rd Youth Mission Trip. Praise the Lord! I thank God for inspiring the youths to have a heart for mission trip. This is my 2nd time going to Cambodia with the youths. I still remember the first trip when I led as a leader. Haha! Really a new experience. And now this year, I am still leading but not as the team leader but as a Youth Advisor. "sob. sob" I have grown up... Every mission trip seems to be like a milestone in my life. Honestly, every mission trip is like a trip to the mountain to find God! And without fail, He is there and seems so much closer. And He speaks and His word means so much. And aso as I come to Him on issues and decision-making, He will speak so clearly that it is as if He was beside me, speaking to me. And even as we are going to embark on your preparation phase for the Mission Trip, I am preparing myself to encounter God face to face. I want to hear Him, I want to know where He wants to lead me to, I want Him to be involved in my decision making. And every time after Mission Trip, I am refreshed, refocused and renewed. Likewise, this year after the Mission Trip, the Lord will impressed upon me new direction in my life and my life is going into a new phase. I shall wait patiently unto Him. If this is what You say, then I will wait until after Mission Trip.